People are not ok
Abortion rights under attack, a formula shortage, covid rates rising again with almost 1 million dead in the US, and this past weekend, another deadly racist massacre by a white supremacist domestic terrorist... all differing outcomes of similar systemic root causes. Knowing it's the system working exactly as designed doesn't make it hit any less hard though.
I’ve been catching up with Brene Brown podcast episodes from the past few months and one thing she keeps saying is “people are not ok.” I appreciate that framing. I don’t think I’m any more or less ok than anyone else. Which is to say that I’m more ok than some and less ok than others.
I think that collectively we are not ok.
It’s not that we are all having the same experience, we are not. But it’s like the entire damned bell curve has shifted. And maybe it’s not even the same shape anymore. Maybe it was never a bell curve to begin with.
The pandemic doesn’t let leaders off the hook for a toxic work culture, or for harm within an organization that disproportionately falls on those who don’t confirm to dominant culture and identity.
It is, however, something to be designed for - for ourselves, our teams and our organizations.
Because what it means is that we are all, variously and not necessarily equally, at a more limited capacity than pre-pandemic times. Our nervous systems are shot. Our trauma is closer to the surface and more easily activated. The tools and strategies that used to work aren’t enough any more. And remember that surge capacity article that was widely shared in the summer of 2020 when it already felt like the “months were dragging on?” Well, we STILL have limited surge capacity, which means we are less resourced to deal with the “normal” emergencies that are part of life.
And sure, while some people may be blithely declaring that the pandemic is over and it’s back to business as usual, I suspect that many people may be acting that way without actually feeling it.
Like it or not, we’re still in a stage of “ambiguous loss.”
I know that’s where I am.
And I’m finding myself turning back to some of the tools and guidance that was helpful earlier in the pandemic.
For example, the suggestions in the surge capacity article feel (sadly) just as relevant today as they did two years ago:
Accept that life is different right now
Expect less from yourself
Recognize the different aspects of grief
Experiment with “both-and” thinking
Look for activities, new and old, that continue to fulfill you
Focusing on maintaining and strengthening important relationships
Being slowly building your resilience bank account by focusing on: sleep, nutrition, exercise, meditation, self-compassion, gratitude, connection, and saying no
There are a couple of past CCI blog posts I’ve been going back to as well (because you know everything we share with clients and write about are things we need for ourselves too). One is Burnout, burnout, burnout, burnout... with the seven ways you can complete the stress cycle without getting stuck:
Movement and physical activity (I admit I inwardly groaned when I heard this one... but wait, there's more!)
Breathing - deeper, slower breaths (this one is easy and sounds silly but it really does work)
Positive social interactions
Hugs
Crying (the cathartic kind where you move through feelings rather than feed into them)
Laughing (not the polite or defensive kind, but the deep uncontrollable belly laugh kind)
Creative expression
The other one is Infusing trauma and equity awareness into decision making and planning which lists four priorities:
Predictability
Flexibility
Empowerment
Connection
I’ve been using these as guides to decision making and planning for myself, my team and my family and it’s been quite helpful.
How are you feeling and what’s been helping you?
Banner photo by Helmuts Rudzitis on Unsplash
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